Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

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I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Why do Democrats call any Republican "Magats", like they are subhuman?

I see through liars

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I actually pay taxes

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I can read

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I can count

Can you give an example of a documentary where the person telling the story believed it to be true, but it turned out to be false?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

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I have complete contempt for fakery

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

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I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

How can one justify in Sweden that total subsidies for public green energy initiatives being approximately 8.2 billion SEK per year? Electric cars at market price typically cost an average of 500,000 SEK which is above household budgets.

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

What do bad boys know that nice guys don't?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I have a reading level above third grade

Why are people with Asperger syndrome unenthusiastic?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

We were all expecting an Iran / Israel / Trump the " Axis of Bullshit " war show as an " October Surprise", we all know they're colluding to try & help Trump win, are we smart enough to ignore their BS and vote blue?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I understand how hurricane paths work

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t buy bullshit

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light